2011

I say goodbye to a crappy year! I welcome 2012 and here is to new friends! Friends who care and want me to succeed and want me to be happy.

Here is a great article:

http://createyourgreatlife.wordpress.com/

I especially like number 1:

Stop spending time with the wrong people. – Life is too short to spend time with people who suck the happiness out of you. If someone wants you in their life, they’ll make room for you. You shouldn’t have to fight for a spot. Never, ever insist yourself to someone who continuously overlooks your worth. And remember, it’s not the people that stand by your side when you’re at your best, but the ones who stand beside you when you’re at your worst that are your true friends.

Damn right! So glad that at the end of this year I made some new friends, rekindled friendships with people I didn't think were my friends and got rid of old baggage that kept me down. Sometimes, you don't realize that a relationship with someone is over.. sometimes that decision gets made for you, and though it hurts and it sucks, once you get through the pain, you realize that it was about damn time!

I was thinking about that yesterday when I ran. I actually ran, no shin splints, no negativity. My friend Sara is great, she really keeps me encouraged. I am so happy we met and I talked to her about running! Positivity is definitely something I need in my life.

Today was a good workout. Took a friend out and started the Couch to 5k program with her, week 1. I was really proud that she did it. It just is extremely hard to run! I was so happy that I barely broke a sweat or felt winded when we did our jogging!!

After that, Alex had tae kwon do and then I did yoga for 90 minutes. I always forget how much I love yoga, and how it stretches out my back and neck better than a masseuse. Burned about 800 calories today working out.

food today:

B:banana

L:split pea and ham soup, homemade

banana, small piece of pineapple.

D: Going to the japanese steakhouse with my family. Not sure what I will have yet.

jogged today!

Getting myself together today.

Got a great workout in with my workout buddy!

I have been working out lately, but not posting, but I'm back to diet/exercise posting along with all my journaling.

Today:

B: banana, 90

S: tangerine, 40

L: steak fajitas, no tortilla. I had just the meat/veggies, but with fresh guac.. Probably 500 for the meal, but 200 for the guac

s: split a protein shake with my w/o buddy, about 150..

D: some split pea and ham soup

Did 60 minutes on the treadmill, and I was proud that I jogged almost the last 25 minutes barely slowing down/stopping, YAY!!! Then we did a crossfit workout for 25 more minutes.

I was so afraid I was going to puke!!

Soul Searching..

I've had to do some real soul searching the past few months.. and its been so difficult. I've just been so sad and bummed.. and then to be treated bad by someone who was supposed to be my friend.. I've just had it! So glad to see 2011 go.. its not been a great year.

Trying to get all the holiday junk foods out of my system and back on my workout plan.. I've been really struggling the past few months.. Sad over my Grandfather.. sad over things that haven't ever been.. just sad and mad in general.. I'm over fake people and the bullshit personal problems people have and the crap people project onto you.. and I'm tired of being sad and mad. I have been working out, but not eating very well, and I know that is a huge part of it.

So, I'm back with posting my calories and gym work. My goal is about 1500 cals a day, and some activity.

We had a great Christmas, and Alex got a kinect from his Auntie, and that thing is pretty fun!

Ok, I did really, really good today. Worked out.
Did 3 rounds of 10 thrusters, 10 modified pullups, 10 pushups and 10 GHD's. My legs are ridiculously sore today! I worked out with this guy I met off the crossfit board. I felt kind of stupid, like I invaded their workout. I won't do that next time. I don't know.

Anyway.. I guess I haven't updated in awhile, our basement flooded from hurricane Irene and we had some damage to our shingles. Nothing too bad. I started this diet from the holistic nutritionist I saw.. so far, so good, 3 pounds down since Tuesday.

Today, I am tired.

Battan down the hatches, friends!

Hurricane Irene is on her way..

Hope we don't get too much rain/damage.

Yesterday, rest day.

Today 13 minutes treadmill (1 minute walk, alternate with 1 minute run), then 20 minutes on the arc trainer.

Got some Vibram Fivefingers: http://www.vibramfivefingers.com/products/Five-Fingers-Sprint-Womens.htm

I have to say that I absolutely LOVE these shoes. My feet finally have no pain when I work out!

Tuesday's wod

Warmup 10 minutes.

6 timed rounds of:

65 pound deadlifts 10 reps
modified pullups 10 reps
rope slaps 10 reps

1:19
1:05
1:09
1:10
1:11
1:11

My arms are sore.

Praying.

I'm praying for my little sister that she doesn't have cervical cancer.

Dear God, please send your mighty angels down from heaven and heal her body. Thank you God!!

3 day shake cleanse..

I cannot remember what exercise I did after last Wednesday! I think I went to the gym Thursday, but for the life of me, I cannot remember.

Anyway, we were car shopping Saturday and then Sunday and Monday I was lazy.

Tonight, I'll be on the elliptical or arc trainer and then I have my martial arts club.

I just started a crossfit group and our first meetup will be Thursday evening.

Anyway, today I'm trying to cleanse, I started a 3 day Shakeology cleanse. (You can order if you'd like: http://myshakeology.com/chrystee).

So far, so good.. I had a chocolate shake mixed with 1/2 banana for breakfast, and I'm getting ready to drink my greenberry w/ 1/2 banana for lunch. I have a mango for snack later.

For dinner we are having grilled pork chops and steamed veggies and a shake after workout tonight.

Last weekend..

Not a good weekend food wise. I didn't eat totally insane, but I did eat off plan. Traveling and vacation seem to be hard for me. Anyway, gained back 8 freaking pounds that I lost, so pretty irritated. Hopefully just water. Back on plan today.

Wednesday: warmed up and 30 minutes boxing, I was exhausted after!

Thursday: I cannot remember, but I think I skipped thursday.

Friday and Saturday: LOTS of walking around NYC

Tuesday (Last night): 10 minute warm up and 60 minutes of martial arts, and a jog/walk around the neighborhood while Alex rode his bike.

A Great PCOS Link

http://theprimalparent.com/2011/07/07/an-unconventional-approach-to-pcos-polycystic-ovarian-syndrome/

Cuong Nhu

Cuong Nhu is the style of martial arts I am doing. I am really enjoying learning how to punch, block and kick better! And I will be able to defend myself, if I ever need to.

Tonight:

40 minutes arc trainer

60 minutes martial arts.

over 800 calories burned tonight.

Tomorrow will be a xfit wod. Oh, and boxing with stephanie! I best not forget!

Puke!

I want to puke!

My friend had to change to Wednesday, so I did 15 minutes on the arc trainer to warm up, 5 minutes on the row machine and then a 4x4 wod:

25 lb kettlebell swings,

15 boxjumps,

15 sumo high pulls

15 abmat situps

x4.

I want to puke.

A great morning..

I feel good today, still a little sore from Saturday's AMRAP workout.

I took Sunday off from exercise, because my inner thighs and back were screaming. I decided to rest.. my son and I were going to go swimming, but decided on seeing "Mr. Popper's Penguins" on base, which was a good thing because as we were driving towards the theatre, we saw lots of lightning.

Today will be boxing with my friend (she is a trainer at my gym), Stephanie. I'm sad though, because I've just recently met and became friends, but her and her husband will be pcs'ing to the west coast in a week or so. :(

Paleo is going good still. I think I may be at 9 pounds gone. I am definitely feeling awesome. I can tell a big difference; my skin is really clearing up (I've had horrible acne on my forehead lately) and I can definitely tell that I am having less gastrointestinal issues. No bloating, no gas, just feeling terrific.

This weekend we are heading to NYC. I am meeting up with an Australian friend that I've known online for about 10 years. I am VERY excited to meet her! Also, my son will be seeing his cousins, Kaori and Reika. This will be the first time we meet Reika. :)

Also my sister and her fiance will be heading up with us. I am hoping that Saturday morning we can go do something fun, maybe a museum.. I really, really want to see the Alexander McQueen exhibit at the Metropolitan Museum of Modern Art.

Only a month to go before my Sister in Law's wedding! I cannot wait!

Have a great day!

AMRAP 3x5

Did a quick 10 minute warm up on the arc trainer this morning.

Then met with Van, my crossfit trainer and we did As Many Reps As Possible (AMRAP) for 3 minutes, 3 exercises, 5 rounds.

3 Burpees

6 20 lb kettlebells swings

9 air squats.

I did ok, my rounds were

2 and 2/3

3 and 1/3

3 and 1/3

3 and 1/3 and a few seconds left.

3 and 1/3 and a few seconds left.

Doesn't seem like a whole lot but by round 3, I wanted to puke.. on round 4 I picked up serious steam and I feel awesome.

Feeling great and first WOD

So about 2 weeks ago, I met with a trainer who does all crossfit training.. I've been dabbling with learning the crossfit stuff for about a year, a friend is big into it. Well, I've been reading the website, but its so confusing to me, so I met with Van, and he explained some basics. After practicing the basics, I finally did my first 5x4 workout today! The sweat was unbelievable and I hit an all time heart rate (167), and I didn't get dizzy, which is great for me!

I still see my strength trainer and we do arms and legs on Fridays. I'm feeling really strong, and this is my 3rd week paleo. I did have some alcohol last week, and that seemed to stall me. I also worked LONG hours in San Diego, and didn't have any time to work out much.

However, I was pretty proud of myself in that I really did well with my eating plan, I think.. I kept a bag of nuts in my purse when I was hungry, and when we had sandwiches, I removed the bread and only at the insides. I did have one small piece of bread that came with my salad at one restaurant and we did have a few drinks 2 nights, but other than that, I did really great.

Going to try to update more often and put in my workouts, so I can keep track of the different wods i've done.

Today
10 minutes arc trainer warmup then;
5x4 of:
kettlebells 20 pounds, 15 reps
boxjumps on the tiny box, 15 reps
sumo pulls, 15
cross pushups (modified pushups, but no knees) 10, with a 10-15 second plank after
abmat situps, 15-20

took me about 30 minutes to do 4 rounds.

Wednesday
45 minutes spin ride, 400 cals burned

Tuesday
Skipped

Monday
Massage, I was hurting!

Sunday
90 minute bike ride, "Ride to Kona". Very inspirational. 25 miles and 700 calories!

Feeling fantastic!

Today is my 4th day on Paleo. I've been really reading up on it and I am trying to incorporate some crossfit. I'm feeling excited that that the scale has started moving back down, 5 pounds lost this week, hurray!!

I also had a couple of down days, so I feel like that is a good step for me that I was able to keep myself in check and actually stick to what I want to do. I feel good also, because I know that a low carb lifestyle is what I do have to do to keep my PCOS in check.

I didn't end up going to the Seminar, unfortunately. My Sister's Grandmother died, and she couldn't come, and I still don't feel like my husband backs me up on it. I'm trying again. I can do this, I know I can. My biggest issue is staying motivated. As long as I can not emotionally eat and stay motivated I will. I really want to try to lose 80 pounds by January. It can be done.

My Sister in law's wedding is in a month and a half, and I'd love to just get a little more in shape and lose a few more pounds.

So I am just trying to understand the crossfit workouts. They don't make a lot of sense to me, so I've been doing a lot of reading. There is a trainer at my gym who does the crossfit, so I'm goign to talk to him. I don't really want to pay someone though if I can do it on my own.

I also joined my friends 200 sit up a day challenge, and finally did my first 200 last night!


Last weekend, my husband and I went to finally see Coheed & Cambria (one of my favorite bands). It was pretty exciting! My Mom kept my son overnight *gasp* and we actually had a little mini weekend away. :)

The concert was good. They only played 45 minutes, because they were opening for Soundgarden. Also good, but wow, I couldn't believe the amount of people smoking weed. That seemed so crazy. Anyway, we left halfway through Soundgarden to get back to our hotel so that we could get up at 4am and head home. We made it just in time to pick up the dogs without getting charged a second day, and picked up our munchkin.

Then me and the munchkin headed to the pool and spent about 4 hours swimming. All I need in my life are my family. We had a great weekend. He was so tired he conked out at 5:30 pm and slept all night! I really expected him to wake up at 8pm or so, but he didn't. Ever since he had his ear tubes redone it seems that he is just feeling so much better.

This weekend should be hectic, then I fly out at 8am to San Diego. Only crappy thing is that I have to leave the house by 5am to make it up there. blah!

Anyway, other than crossfit, I started doing a martial arts class at my gym that is free. Very interesting. I'm going to go at least once a week. Spinning at lunch yesterday and today I'm heading to uppercuts/rock bottoms so me and my son can go swimming after work!

One thing i've learned in life

Everyone has their agenda; whether it be God/Jesus, atheism, politics, whatever.. Someone wants you to believe in what they are selling.

I just don't know if I really understand motives anymore. Tired of the games!

Feeling better.

Well, I found out that in order to go back to my old job, I'd have to take a massive pay cut (what the heck??)

Anyway, things have been SO much better. I decided to let things roll off my back and not worry about it and try to make the best of things.

I also figured that I should start looking into going forward with the weight loss surgery. I've looked into it for at least 6 years, and I think its time. I found out that with the insurance I have with my company that they will cover it 100%. Maybe that is a sign that its time!

My Sister is coming with me to orientation on July 12th. I am excited and feeling so nervous, but I know this is going to really have a good impact on me. I've been reading and reading and it looks like my best option is going to be the Vertical Sleeve Gastroectomy. Instead of the Roux en Y where they redirect your organs. With the VSG, they just make your stomach smaller. There seems to be a lot less problems with this type of surgery, because your stomach can still process minerals and vitamins, its just much, much smaller.

I will have to follow a presurgery diet, and I'm excited to do so. I'll post more when I find out more info next week!

I'm still working out and I've ramped up my motivation. My goal is 6 days a week for at least 60 minutes. So far, I am exceeding that. Thursday and Friday I worked out for 90 minutes, Saturday we went to Pennsylvania, and Sunday I took my son swimming for 2 hours and then did 90 minutes at the gym. Monday, I went at 9:30 (pm) and did 30 minutes on the arc trainer, and 25 on the elliptical with arm weight machines. Feeling good and SO much better than last week.

Past few weeks.

I have had a few very emotional weeks in the past month.

I've felt so disappointed in people in my life lately, and in myself. I feel like there is a lot to say, but don't know what to say.

I totally dislike my job.. I'm not sure if I'm into this whole church thing.. and I absolutely loathe myself.

My job. Man, I thought this was a good thing, but I find myself so annoyed at feeling as if I am being very micromanaged. I also feel like its a very negative atmosphere. I don't know if that shadows my mood, but I've felt so let down by people who were supposed to be there for me, which may have exacerbated how I've felt.

My old position came open, and I hope that I can go back. I miss all the friends I had there and just fun I had during the day. Now I am dreading going to work in the mornings. I'm glad that I am supposed to be the only one there tomorrow! It is hard to work with someone who wants things done a certain way, which makes everything harder! I feel like it is very chaotic and disorganized and I am used to a very organized process.

My church. I like the people at my church, I just feel so overwhelmed with everything. I thought I was supposed to be devoted to God, and not a church. I begin to feel like I'm at church every day, because there is so much going on and a small church. Totally different than the church that talked and talked and never did anything. This church just goes and goes. I don't understand how people can even balance anything. My house becomes a mess and I have no time to work out. I have GOT to work out and be healthy, because then I won't be of any use to anyone.

What makes it worse is that my husband has totally retreated out. That makes things difficult and every time I'm there I get asked where is he, he must be busy at work. I just feel like not even going anymore. What is it, is it just the devil? or is it just life? Is it just me? What is the point anyway, is it just to "stay out of hell"? Everyone becomes so judgemental in that setting. People get hurt.. its just too much.

And yes, I loathe myself. Why is it SO hard. Is it me? I mean, is there something just wrong with me or am I just a big fat slob? Just don't eat it! Just have a small piece. No, I have to have food on my damn brain all the time. WHAT THE FUCK. Its just FOOD. Its not my damn friend, or my enemy.. its JUST food. Why do I want to just stuff my face anytime I feel sad or mad or whatever? I just don't what to do with this life. So unhappy. Then I remember, I'm 31. Jesus.. I'm not a kid anymore. I just feel like I've wasted so much time in my life. So much time wasted on bullshit and people who don't give a shit.

Hard day today..

First thing in the morning, this guy at work made me cry. :( He was so rude to me.. I know I've got a bit of PMS, so I'm already sensitive. He was just nasty to me. I just said OK to him, turned around and I could feel the tears begin to swell in my eyes.. I brushed it off, and said, whatever, but then I could feel the floodgates begin to open. Its been a long time since I cried like that! But then I was so pissed that I allowed someone to make me cry, that it made it worse.

I was in the bathroom, thank God I made it.. I waited till whoever was in there left, and my eyes were so red. Like I was crying for a week straight! Of course someone came into the bathroom and I felt like a douche. Luckily, I like her and she is pretty new like me, and I just told her some people are just rude. She totally understood.. but then my Supervisor walked it. Talk about freaking embarrassing. I hate people to see me cry, but especially people who are my superiors, argh. However, about an hour later she sent me an email and asked me if I was interested in playing bunco with her group, lol.

I've been really depressed.. and haven't been keeping up with my eating. I gained back 15 of the 30 I've lost. :( I just start thinking what the hell, it will never happen! I'm such a loser man..

I decided to start watching my carb intake anyway.. My Dr. says that to be able to even lose weight with the PCOS, I have to do it, because regular carbs make my insulin spike, so I'm insulin resistant. I just see so many people freaking lose the weight and they seem so much happier.

Anyway, I started back to that on Monday, I am down 2 pounds, which thrills me. Since I'm thinking about the WLS surgery again (finally have insurance that covers it!).. I know I will have to do a low carb/high protein diet in the future anyway. Plus with the PCOS, its just what I have to do if I want to get healthy!

We had a great vacation to the outer banks. I love it there. I was a little depressed coming back to real life.

My Dh is not feeling church again.. Ugh. I feel like such a fool for ever being optimistic that things would change.. however, I have also been feeling overwhelmed by everything going on. I honestly do not know how some people eat, breath, sleep church things and work full time jobs/raise their kids etc.

I'm feeling anxious for Monday, my son has his ear tube/adenoid surgery. :(

Anyway, it was just a hard day. I'm glad I'm off tomorrow. I think I will get my toes done!!

No more crying!

Another 2 weeks have gone by..

and as usual, if I'm not blogging, I'm probably eating.

I'm back on track now, after an ok day yesterday. Life has been busy and that seems to be when I make poor choices.

I started seeing a new trainer last Friday. Oh my Lord. She wanted me to jump up on a box (a la biggest loser).. I had to get a much shorter box. Why is it so scary? Cause I know I am klutzy and will fall. Then she straps a rope around my waist and I have to do sprints with her holding me back. I only did it like 4 times, and such a short distance, and even though I could probably pick her up and throw her across the room, she really pulls hard! Holy moly.

My new resolve is that if I don't get to the gym that day, I WILL do a video at home. I have enough of them, and Alex likes to exercise. Last night we did Cardio X (p90x). It wasn't too bad. The first 20 minutes is yoga, then kicking, etc. He was so cute doing downward dog.

Tonight I'll be doing something else since the hubby has to be at church after work.

I'm going to start packing his lunch too. He doesn't eat enough during the day.

I'm working hard on being motivated. It can be SO hard. Especially when everyone wants to go out to eat, or activities just center around food. We are going to try to hike this Saturday.. can't wait!

I will be listing my food here again, it was very visual and easier for me to go back and see what I'm eating and how much I lost at that time. I'm still doing weightwatchers too.

Today:
Smart Ones Egg, Sausage and cheese wrap, 6 pts.
Honey yogurt, 3 pts.
orange
salad w/ balsamic, 1 pt.
Amy's veggie lasagna, 6
Skinny Caramel Macchiato, 3 pts.
2 red potatoes w/ earth balance butter, 6 pts.

I've got 19 left for dinner, plus whatever activity points I earn tonight.

Its been 2 weeks..

As you can imagine, not updating for 2 weeks means = bad eating/little exercise.

I did work out last Tuesday and Wednesday and we've been walking around the neighborhood, between the rain.

I'm back on track as of yesterday. Weekends seem to be really difficult for me. Hubby was sick all weekend, and the kid and I ate out a bunch.

Yesterday, I did really well and ate within my points (despite two donuts that made their way into my mouth). Had some really good haddock for dinner..

A friend told me she was teaching body pump at my gym, so I came to her class.. burned 350 calories in an hour and then came home and walked the dogs for an additional 200 calories. Alex

Today, at lunch, I'm heading over to do Uppercuts/Rock bottoms. Woohoo!

Back on track..

I used being sick as an excuse to not eat too well.. as a result, 5 pound gain. I'm sure some of that is water, so hopefully it will go right back off. Finally back to my old self. I was feeling great, but then my sore throat started coming back and I was really exhausted. I think Alex's soccer should be cancelled tonight, and worship practice is cancelled, so hopefully I can get in the gym tonight. I did go to spinning last Wednesday and that was hard, my chest was still pretty congested. I had a hard couple days with dealing with my husband and church. He is a very sensitive person, and he is also a perfectionist. When someone says something critical of him, he takes it SO hard. So we were dealing with his feelings on that. The enemy definitely attacks in any way that you are weak. He knows our weaknesses. We have to keep him at bay. I pray for God's protection! I'm so thankful for warm weather. Even though it is raining today, yesterday was so wonderful. It felt great to open windows and let the nice weather in. I feel like Spring Fever is setting in and I felt like going through closets and drawers and getting rid of junk and cleaning. I finally went grocery shopping and made grilled chicken and broccoli with baked beans for dinner. It was pretty good. Alex really made me laugh last night.. We were eating some thin rolls and dipping it in hummus, he got off his chair and said now I thank god for this bread to eat.. then he got some juice out of the fridge and it is dark red; blueberry/pomegranate juice and he was like, this is jesus blood and we drink it and thank you god for jesus blood. It was so cute, but amazing. He really is picking up a lot of things from church! Praise the Lord! We read our bible every night and if we talk about the "bad guys", he says, Mommy, is this the bad guys? Did they hurt Jesus? The other day he said, "Mommy, I don't like those bad guys who hurt Jesus. That's not nice". My Godbaby is turning 2, and we celebrated his birthday on Saturday.. He is so cute and he finally loves me. The secret is giving the little kids presents. Mwuahahah!

First Spring Soccer Practice..

Went well yesterday! My boy did a great job, and was so excited to see his friend Britney. They were so cute together and had a great time.

I was really proud of my boy for getting out there and having fun and even scoring a goal during one of their games at the end. It was pretty cold (50) but they had a great time!

Finally better!

Phew, that was a loooong week of being sick and blah. I went to my regular Doctor yesterday, becuase, in spite of my week long Z-pack, my throat still felt like rusty razor blades were slicing my throat every time I swallowed. I ate badly yesterday and had 2 banana pudding milkshakes from chickfila. They have like 20 points a piece. So good and cold on my throat though. Anyway, my Doctor said that Zpacks just don't work very well anymore, and gave me a new antibiotic and today I feel 100% better. I think tomorrow I can get to the gym and spin. I haven't worked out since our last hike on the 19th! Wow, I need to step it up. So excited for my son tonight, he has real outdoor soccer practice. I hope its warm enough and I hope there are no tears and he just goes and has fun.

On the mend and good news!

Starting to feel better today..

I have two great things to share, first.. I've lost 30 pounds since December. Thank you Lord for blessing me. The difference is God. I can't do it on my own. Second, we started our group at church for youth ministry. I'm very excited to be starting the Teen Youth group. I know God has called me to lead his youth.

I am so excited! More later..

Sick..

I got hit with a sickness Monday and have been soooo sick.

I couldn't even drive myself to Urgent Care.. and I'm still recovering.

Boo.

7.5 mile hike

Yesterday morning I did a body combat class. It was great, much like turbo, but I didn't love it as much as turbo.. anyway, I burned about 500 calories during that class.

Today, we hiked 7.5 miles and about 40 minutes faster than last week. 1100 calories burned.

I miss you terribly..

I miss you friend. Hope you are doing ok. I miss talking to you.

I've reached my first goal..

In about 3 months, I've lost 25 pounds! I am .25 of my goal of 100 pounds lost.

I haven't worked out since Saturday, our hike, because I've had a bit of a cold. However, today I did go to the gym and did a 60 minute spin class, burned 500 calories. I bought a kit at walmart, Jillian Michaels kettlebell set. I'm going to do some kettlebells in the morning before work.

Still worried about my husbands family in Japan. He claims its ok in Tokyo.. :(

Been so busy!!

Tuesday - Did a weight/squat/abs class,

Wednesday - elliptical for 10, spin for 30

Thursday - none

Friday - Spinning

Saturday - 7.5 mile hike!!! (Almost 1200 calories burned!)

Sunday - none, blisters and SORE

Monday - same!

I'm about recovered now. Also, last Wednesday, I joined Weightwatchers, and I'm down 3 pounds as of yesterday!

Will update tomorrow.

So sleepy.

I could honestly just go home and go back to bed and sleep all day. I'm on the verge of sleep at my desk! Not good! I don't know why.. I was in bed by 11 and got up at 6.

I did pretty good yesterday, ended up around 1100 calories..
Went to the gym and did 30 minutes on the arc trainer and 20 on the elliptical for 450 calories burned. I was really sweating!!

God is GREAT!

Our women's conference was awesome and amazing. "Women Working the Word".

Our speakers were just absolutely wonderful. Even though they didn't know each other, their sermons totally meshed. It was a very busy, awesome weekend.

One Pastor in particular, Pastor Ericka Sanders from North Carolina. Pastor Ericka is this tiny, beautiful woman, but what a powerful voice for God. I asked her to pray over me, and I could feel the Holy Spirit in my gut. I felt such a connection to her. I think I'm going to send her a card. Both Kevin and I just loved her so much.

I am so grateful for what God is doing in our lives! Thank you God! Thank you for the changes in my husband. He's done a complete 180.. at times I just can't believe it. He is totally on fire for the Lord, it is amazing. I am in complete awe. I love the change in myself too. I am starting to feel such joy and happiness. I don't want to feel negative any longer. I want to feel happy about myself and my life. I don't want to hinder my blessings ever again. I want blessings to persue me and overtake me. I am trusting in God. I feel so happy when my son tells me his prayer, "God is great".. its so adorable. Our whole family is building Kingdom relationships at church.. and I'm finding some at work too. I'm even learning how to rebuild relationships with my family and old friends. I am feeling so excited about how God is using my family for his Kingdom. I just love where my church is going and I know that one day soon, we will be able to be employed full time with church.

I ran on Friday: 1 minute walk, 2 minute jog for the first 20.. then 1 walk, 1 run for another 14. It was SO hard, but its getting easier. I can't wait until I can run for 30 minutes straight.

I wasn't on track with eating, really, but I barely had much time to think about it. I will be better this week, thank you God! I'm sort of on a plateau right now, but that is fine with me. I'm still down 21 pounds and that is better than where I was in December. Praise you God! Also, my clothes are barely hanging on, so I know I've lost a lot of inches. I am so thankful.

Tired again..

"Do not grieve, for the joy of the LORD is your strength." - Nehemiah 8:10..

I can't wait until our women's conference this Saturday. It will be amazing, thank you Father!

I am learning SO much. Thank you Jesus for answering my prayers.

Something my Pastor keeps reiterating is how unless you are really studied, you will keep praying and living your life the same way year after year, problem after problem. You have to believe in your prayers, and you have to make changes in your life in order to get there. His testimony Sunday was that, after about 4 years on blood pressure and cholesterol medication, he was finally able to stop all medication. But in that, he had to make some changes. He had to stop eating fried foods, he had to exercise.. We have to make changes in order to reap the benefits and that things can be hindering our prayers being answered. What a revelation to me. I am changing my life, and I am changing me.

My cals were a bit high today. I was really ravenous. I ate a lean cuisine meal, and I feel like that is partly to blame. I also had like 5 dark chocolates. I have to stay OUT of the candy!

40 minutes spin class today, 350 cals burned. It was a great class and I was soaked!

Tired.

Tired. No exercise today.. work then church till 10.

Praise God that my friend may come to church Sunday. I know she will love it. Thank you God.

Totals	1,411	52	14	186	19	59
Your Daily Goal	1,560	52	17	215	18	59
Remaining	149	0	3	29	-1	0
	Calories	Fat	Sat Fat	Carbs	Fiber	Protein

Get Behind Me Satan.

I know who you are - the king of liars, "the great deceiver". I have begun to recognize your ways! I know your familiar feeling now. The punch in my gut, the inadequate feelings. You may not have my joy. This is not your territory any more. Leave. Get behind me, out of my face, I shall stomp on you. I shall carry a double edged sword, God shall cover me with his mighty armor. I shall have victory over you, and begin to live my life. You tried to covet my joy as a little girl, and you shall lay claim over me no longer. I am a child of God. I am good. I am worthy. He knew me even before I was formed in my Mother's womb. You have tried to break me for 30 years, and I shall give you not another second. Flee from me! I cast you out in Christ Jesus' name.

AMEN

Good day for eating healthy and exercise.

Went to the gym right after work and did a crazy awesome spinning class. 45 minutes and 400 calories burned. YES! I was dripping sweat. It was great. I've been hitting higher heart rates, and when I get into the 160's I start burning high calories. I've started even sweating more, which is a really good thing.

FOOD:

chobani caramel yogurt

salad

1/2 tandoori chicken breast

granola bar

raw red bell pepper

baby carrots

orange

1 cup turkey chili

1 cup rice chex and soy milk

hummus

granola bar

Totals	1,198	67	7	164	23	68
Your Daily Goal	2,251	75	25	310	26	85
Remaining	1,053	8	18	146	3	17
	Calories	Fat	Sat Fat	Carbs	Fiber	Protein